The Most Common Mistakes Women Make During the Early Stages of Divorce Part 2: Settling too Quickly

Divorce is emotional, taxing, and overwhelming, and believe me, anyone who has ever gone through a divorce gets it. Sadly, sometimes the choices we make in the beginning of our divorce journey, aren’t in our best interest, and can lead to a greater loss than just the marriage itself. We may react rather than act, or possibly even just “check right out” without handling our situation mindfully or thoughtfully. It makes perfect sense given the emotional upheaval we may experience, coupled with the pragmatic decisions we are now obligated to make. But ready or not, decisions need to be made, some more complicated than others. Which is precisely why every choice you make during this period of time, is critical.

This series will cover the most common mistakes many women make during their divorce. See if you might notice a pattern.

Part 2: Settling too Quickly

Settling too quickly, ignoring what we truly want, need or deserve, for reasons that aren’t in our best interest. Maybe we lose our voice and are not confident enough to express our own opinions or self-advocate. Or maybe we want things wrapped up as soon as possible just to keep the peace.

But those decisions, settlements, are not only binding in the short term, but bind you for the rest of your life. We may think that we don’t need certain “luxuries” now, but what about in the future? Two, four, 10 years down the road the things you relinquished or gave away out of some sense of misplaced responsibility, duty, or desire to not make waves, may make a significant difference in your life.

Life insurance, pensions, college funds, physical illness, these are all life experiences that many tend to skip over when it comes to just trying to move on quickly without thinking things through. Plus, guilt can make us terrible negotiators. But guilt and responsibility are very, very different.

Remember that you not only deserve to but also have the responsibility to start the next chapter of your life off right.